next chapter...

It breaks my heart, more than a little...to admit that the chapter that this blog has filled in my life has come to a close...when I got pregnant last year with Lila, I promised and promised myself that my close relationship with Joseph would not change, not ever. But change it has, just by the unstoppable force of life change. I love him just as I ever did...more even of course, but as we've added in another PERSON to our family, relationships must shift and grow to accomodate the changes.

When I dug out the plastic bins from the basement containing Joseph's baby clothes, I sorted through the clothes, picking out what might work for the new baby. We 'knew' we were having a girl, and and we did. When I was pregnant with Joseph, we'd decided not to find out what the gender of the baby was, so, as a result, I had alot of unisex newborn clothes. But as I sorted through those clothes, deciding what she might need, I found myself setting aside onesies, pajamas, sweaters...things that would be perfectly suitable for this new baby, and setting them aside in a special box to be put away. You see, I only wanted to remember Joseph in those clothes. I remember snuggling his little body in that pair of striped pajamas. I remember lifting him out of the Bjorn in that sweater. I don't want those memories to be jarred by another little body being in them. As it turned out, I had more than enough clothes for Lila as friends and family were generous with gifts and hand-me-downs...but I'm sure I won't be sharing all of her clothes for the next friend who has a girl...she'll have her own special box.

This blog was all about Joseph and a few tidbits about our life, my life, besides. This is the special box that I don't want to share with the new baby. The new baby...Lila...will have her box, one that also contains Joseph, me, Clay, and some other wonderful tidbits from our life.

This blog had also been sorely railroaded by Facebook...stories and quotes, easy to 'jot' down there, didn't make it to this venue. So, in honor of the closing of this chapter...I give you "Joseph Quotes".

Be sure to check out the next chapter..."My Heart is Made of Nectar" in honor of one of his best quotes. http://nectarheart.squarespace.com/

July 16, 2010 "I wish I was blue paint that could paint the sky."

July 10, 2010 Me: "Joseph how do you feel in your heart" (he was acting sad). Joseph: "It feels like I caught a bug in my heart and it's a bee and he thinks my heart is nectar."

June 26, 2020 "Why do you have to go back to work in the Fall?" Me, "to make money for our family." Joseph "So our roof doesn't fall off of our heads?"

June 12, 2010 "I am an expert at many things, like groupers, and boats and signs."

June 4, 2010 "Mama, is that the night over there where Asia is?"

April 28, 2010 (big date gap in FB and quotes due to me being morning sick for 9 months and my Dad getting really sick) "Thank you for the world so sweet, thank you God for Baba Peet."

Sept. 1, 2009 Clay, "You know Jos, you just peed in your leather cowboy boots." Joseph, "I know, just toss them in the washer and clean them up."

Aug 30, 2009 "I have a gentlemen's body, right?"

Aug 27, 2009 In response to being hot, "I need some cold moisture in mine body."

Aug 21, 2009 "When is this frog going to burn off?"

Aug 18, 2009 ‎'i'm gonna put my boots on, and my chappers, and my vest, and my hat and my purse, and ride out into the distance.'

Aug 17, 2009 "I hope the squirrels don't put me in mud and throw grass on me...and then eat me up for their breakfast pie."

Aug. 6, 2009 "Mama, you don't have to work so hard. Just work a little bit."

Aug 5, 2009 "WHERE are my sisters...Alice, Lila, and Iris?!"

Aug 3, 2009 dinner conversation tonight: J: are you a human? ME: yes J: a human girl? ME: yes, are you a human? J: no, I'm a man...well actually I'm a boy, but I'm becoming a man. Oh, and then he went on to tell me how our cat, Girl Cat, is going to become smaller and will then turn into a baby, and then she'll be Joseph's cousin and he'll give the baby to Aunt Malia!...

Aug 1, 2009 Clay: "What should we have for dinner tonight?" Joseph: "Some meat, and a little sister for me."

July 30, 2009 me: apologizing for being in the store too long and leaving Clay and Joseph in the heat of the parking lot. joseph: "don't be sorry, you didn't do anything wrong...mama, you're the best mama in no-where-land."

July 28, 2009 "Mama, I don't think that is going to work (as I put his milk cup on a firm couch pillow), you need to put that on a hard surface."

July 26, 2009 "Daddy, can you not do that? I don't want you to put me on the naughty step just because I put my saddle in the oven."

July 22, 2009 "I love the world and I'm not afraid of anything." later..."Mama, don't be impressed of me."...later still...seeing Gretchen and Andre at the Greenwood Streetfair, "Hey Andre, you like my boots?"...to Gretchen, "What's in your purse?"

Mar. 29, 2009 Cupping an earthworm tightly in his fists and whispering to it …”I am going to name you Jessamyn, and I am going to keep you always.”

Feb. 22, 2009 "I love you Aunt Camio."

Dec. 29th, 2008 "Here you go Mister Bunny. Here you go." (serving tea to Mister Bunny)

Dec 26, 2008 "I'm gonna make sumthin' for you mama."

Dec. 22, 2008 "When you wake, you shall have all the pretty little ponies. When you wake, you'll have a parrot in your eye, and the parrot try to bite you! Yay!" "Way down yonder in the meadow, poor little baby cryin Mama. Apples and bees flutter in his eyes..."

Dec. 10, 2008 "Christmas is not about love and peace. It is about candy. For me."

Dec. 7, 2008 "You play the bomb (guitar) I play the drums."

Nov. 22, 2008 "The horse pooped on the soap."